During Jacobie’s recovery from his operation, he spent a week at Nanna’s house as I had Uni commitments and my other son to look after.

Jacobie loved it, unlimited ice-cream and jelly accompanied by lots of love and attention, not to mention TV.

A few days in, I received a call from my Mum asking me if I knew about the Ex’s new girlfriend.  This was completely new information to me, and I asked Mum why she thought the Ex had a new girlfriend. 

She proceeded to tell me that whilst watching TV that morning, Jacobie saw a plane on the TV and said “Look Nanna, there’s a plane, I go see my Daddy on the plane”.  My Mum thinking this was quite innocent played along and said “Is that right?” The next words out of Jacobie’s mouth certainly shocked my Mum that’s for sure.

Jacobie went on to say “Yes, Nanna, and last time we went to the beach.  There was me and Wyatt, Daddy and Brenda*”.  At the mention of a woman’s name Mum’s ears pricked up.  “Yes Nanna, and there were three beds, one for me, one for Wyatt and one for Daddy and Brenda*”.

You guessed it, I had absolutely no idea that there was a new woman on the scene, nor that she’d been introduced to the boys or gone on holidays with them.  To say I was shocked and pissed off would be an understatement.  Earlier in our breakup, I’d had the conversation with the Ex about talking to each other when and if a new partner was to be introduced to the kids.  This was we could be on the same page when it came to answering questions about new people coming into their lives.  It’s also what I call common courtesy.

When I asked the Ex about it, I was met with a barrage of abuse, telling me I had no need to know about his new partner or anything that goes on in his life.  Needless to say I disagreed but truth be told, our morals and values and what we saw as important always had differed, I just chose to ignore this during my marriage.

Realising I would never win an argument with him, I chose to end the conversation.  After all, there was nothing I could do about it now.  It would later come out that he’d been dating Brenda the whole time we’d been doing our Court Order negotiations, this unfortunately would have been handy to know for it was about to cause a whole lot of drama in the year to come.

But that’s a story for another week.

Thanks for reading

Love and Gratitude


*Name has been changed to protect their identity